May 9 - The Power of Words

This morning I was thinking about a recent visit to an ophthalmologist and the old adage, Sticks and stones can break your bones but words can never hurt you. In truth, I think that words might have an even greater power to hurt than sticks and stones. Certainly, in some cases words can have a far more lasting impact than a bruise or a bump or even a broken bone. At least, that has been my experience.

I clearly remember my first visit to an ophthalmologist. I am sure that he was a very clever man but his bedside manner was severely lacking. I had come to his office after the initial trauma of becoming legally blind. I was emotional to start with and his brusque manner did nothing to sooth me. Basically he said, “Your condition is irreversible. I suggest you go home and learn Braille. There is nothing I can do for you. Don’t bother to make another appointment. It’s just a waste of my time.” That was it. He stood and left the room. Yes, his words were all true, but the effect the delivery of this news had on me and the way the words were spoken left me in an even greater emotional upheaval.

Over time I have had the opportunity to speak with many people about their visits to eye doctors, optometrists and the like. Their experiences have been coloured not so much by the extent of their vision loss but often by the delivery of this news by their specialist.

Last week I again had occasion to be chatting in the office of an ophthalmologist. Again, a very clever man with years of medical training and practical experience to his credit. However, this gentle man made a comment which I hope will stay with me. In a quiet voice, he said:

 “I am often humbled by the accommodations people make when they are faced with very difficult challenges. I have such admiration for them.”

I would hope that I can emulate the attitude of this wise man. His words had a powerful effect on me. People who encounter challenges in their lives are not to be pitied but to be admired for their positive reaction to their circumstances. When I left the office, I resolved again to try to be one of those people held in high esteem by this humble man.