May 17 - Maintaining Confidence

Last weekend I attended a conference. Now, while you may think that isn’t a big deal, trust me when I say that for me it was! The problem was that at this particular conference I would be going alone, would know nobody, and there were bound to be papers to read and discuss. On the other side of the coin, I was quite interested in the topic and really wanted to go. 

Before the day of the conference I spent several anxious moments and restless nights as I pondered the personal challenges of the day. How would I find the registration desk? Where were the washrooms located? Would the men’s and women’s be clearly marked? How would I manage at the coffee and refreshment table? Would I be conspicuous with my white cane? How would I find a chair to sit?  Who would talk with me and possibly guide me when the group changed to the adjoining room? How would I manage the paper work? Would I come across as someone needing pity or just someone who needed a little assistance?

I think that most of these questions were legitimate concerns perhaps for anyone attending a large event on their own but especially for someone without full sight. In the end, and with encouragement from Lyle, I decided that the only way to answer the above was to front up and see what would happen.

I had a great day! Lyle guided me as far as the registration desk, showed me the location of the washrooms, took me to an empty chair and before he left, brought me my first cup of coffee. I was still too anxious to eat any of the muffins. At the roll call, I was still the only one sitting at the round table at the back of the hall. However, shortly after I announced my name and where I was from, a very kind woman approached the table to say that she and another couple of women were from a neighbouring town and would I like to join them.

Would I ever! I gathered up my belongings and followed her to a table near the front. From there the day went well. The five women at the table might have all had extensive training on how to treat a visually impaired person. They were kind and helpful without treating me as being helpless. I was simply another conference delegate. They read appropriate papers for me, asked for my opinions and offered to get me coffee.

When the day was over, I remembered that people are basically kind and helpful when the occasion arises. I was also a little pumped knowing that I had overcome my initial fears and anxieties. I had moved out of my comfort zone and once again practiced stepping out with a modicum of confidence.